This is the first piece of poetry that I am publishing on my blog. It is the culmination of years of pent up thoughts and emotions that finally demanded to be expressed. It is a lament, a resolution, a reckoning, and a battle cry.
House of peace is my name and every day I’ve lived it
As the word says, I’m blessed and the earth I’ll inherit
But this earth beneath my feet is weak and unsteady
Solid ground can’t be found if the founders’ sons and daughters aren’t ready
To stop walking around in a daze
Living life in a bubble, a haze
Staying asleep even when they're awake
So they can dream of an America that’s fake.
But these are not things I can say
Because House of Peace is my name.
~
Left and right hands reached out to meet them where they are
Arms stretched so far that my own heart becomes a target
So, I just keep trying harder
to be the bridge, the link from here to the other side
Then these links weigh down like chains
I’ll be honest, I get exhausted sometimes
So I think of new rhymes to express my frustration
With the selective sympathies of a guilt-ridden nation
That can somehow build memorials in every city for the holocaust
While denying that slavery and white supremacy have costs
That ripple across generations and places
Don’t even get me started on reparations
~
Because how can you repair damage that you say isn’t there?
How can you find justice in a system fundamentally unfair
To all but a few while the rest of us walk around under a cloud of fear
Warding off micro-aggressions, please don’t touch my hair
You see, I even say please, but you’re offended I care
I bite back the history on the tip of my tongue
About human zoos and pencil tests ‘cause those things are no fun
to relay
These days I wake up almost always on the verge of rage
But these are not things I can say
Or I risk my status of being the black girl that’s “safe"
So I listen and think, and I write and pray
At home, I weep and I scream but outside I hide my dismay
Because House of Peace is my name
~
But when peace becomes appeasement I keep you warm meanwhile I’m freezin’
Out in the cold, out in the dark, too scared to shine a light, too scared to light a spark
Because that spark becomes a flame
And my eyes start glowing red
And we all know that no one wants an angry black friend
House of Peace is my name but this house is getting upgrades
A mental renovation and the spiritual permission to be made new
Not just for me but for you, too
Because what real service can I do
For a country that I love
When you only see me as a dove
Safe and soft and a harbinger of peace
But this dove is mourning every morning for the death that she sees
Her wings are getting tired of flying over these seas
Filled with unfulfilled promises and history repeating
Waves of enemies advancing and friends who are retreating
Behind their comfort zone. Now this dove is all alone
With a message to deliver trying to find the right tone
In my path, I see an olive branch and a stone
~
Surprise, surprise, I reach down and take them both
With the stone, I cut the branch and shape it into a pen
That seems to sing across the page giving voice to our pain
Telling tales of what we’ve lost but also everything we’ve gained
Through perseverance, not giving up day after day
Shining light on injustice and staking our claim
In the land that we built through the blood and sweat that we gave
And I’ll keep telling these stories so I can stay sane
‘Cause silence does nothing but remind me of the grave
And finally, the pieces are falling into place
That peace without freedom is a hollow disgrace
Words have the power to open eyes, heal hearts, and liberate
So I have to speak my peace, use my words to create
A space where truth, love, and grace all share the stage
~
Now when I raise my voice, I will no longer be ashamed
I will loudly proclaim the things I know I must say
To honor my people and the choices they made
To look in the mirror and finally feel brave
Enough to fight for a new day
Because House of Peace is my name